Ministry of Motherhood
If you have read my blog titled, Good Grief, you know that my Aunt Cari, who I loved very much, passed away two years ago. About a week before she went home on hospice, I visited her in the hospital. To boost her spirits, I shared with her some silly things the kids had recently said and done. Listening to my stories made her laugh until she cried. With tears streaming down her face, she looked at me and said, “Shorty, you are such a good mom.” She then slowly repeated herself to make sure I could hear her, and added “I mean it” for emphasis. We both sobbed heavy tears realizing this would be one of our last conversations in this lifetime.
On hard days, I close my eyes and replay those words in my mind, trying to remember just how she sounded when she said it. Then, I slowly repeat it out loud, to make sure I can hear myself say, “You are such a good mom.” In her honor, I do my very best to mean it when I say it.
I need this reminder when tending to clutter and chaos, takes priority over slowing down to make connections with my children. In my defense, the house is seemingly in a continuous state of disarray. Pieces and parts of toys and building blocks always find their way to the floor. Books and art supplies often overflow our kitchen table. More times than not, there are dishes in the sink and on the counter tops. And without fail, massive laundry piles abound. Along with the literal marbles strewn across the carpet, my mental marbles often get lost amongst the mess I call home.
Recently, I found myself snapping at every member of my family, as I looked around at the mess that had once again crept in. My patience worn thin, my tone demanding, and my mood shifting the atmosphere, I debated throwing everything in the house away. I opted instead to empty a few bathroom trash cans and fold some clean laundry. After quietly folding and praying for God to give me patience, I was able to regulate my emotions. Turns out, I did not actually need a clean house, to have a clean heart. All I needed to do was receive and extend the grace that Christ has already given.
I ended the night by reading the kids a story and praying with each of them. After prayers, my daughter said, “Mom, I am really glad you are back to yourself again. I feel safe when you feel calm.” Then, she said the words that I did not deserve, but desperately needed to hear: “You are such a good mom.”
The Holy Spirit spoke to me through my child that night, just as He spoke through my aunt two years prior. Her words were a healing balm that restored truth to my weary soul. Although I don’t always feel like I’m succeeding at this motherhood thing, this homeschool thing, or this living life thing, the Lord reminds me daily that feelings are not facts. The fact is that even on my worst day, God’s grace sufficiently covers me. The Bible says, in Romans 3:10&12 (also quoting Psalm 14), “There is no one righteous … there is no one who does good, not even one.” This quote feels bleak, until you read the Good News, just two chapters later … “But God demonstrates his own love for us in this: While we were still sinners, Christ died for us” (Romans 5:8).
I am not good enough to save myself or my family from sin or sorrow, but I can rest assured that I serve a good God. He sent his one and only Son into the world to save us! We can trust Him to meet our needs, forgive our sins, and lead us towards righteousness. We can surrender our desires and demands. We can lay down the need for control right here at the feet of Jesus, in this very moment.
We do not have to carry the weight of motherhood on our shoulders. We needn’t hold onto the guilt of our past mistakes any longer; Jesus already paid the price. Surrender it all to the One who saw the mess before it was even made. And yet, He loved, He died, and He rose again to make a way.
I want to encourage you to take a break from the mess. It will still be there, after you love on your family. Apologize when you make a mistake. Let the fruit of the Spirit be evident to all, especially the people who live with you. Teach your kids that even in our failings, Christ will never leave us or forsake us (Hebrews 13:5). Show them what grace looks like, as you model that example. You may not always feel like a “good mom” but you are doing a good work, as you minister to the hearts of your children each day.
Lamentations 3:22-24 says, “Because of the Lord’s great love we are not consumed, for his compassions never fail. They are new every morning; great is your faithfulness. I say to myself, ‘The Lord is my portion; therefore I will wait for him.’”
God has called you into the ministry of motherhood, and you better believe that He has a plan to use every single moment of it. “And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose” (Romans 8:28). He will provide what you need to get through this day and the next, as you wait on Him.
“Let us hold fast the confession of our hope without wavering, for he who promised is faithful.” - Hebrews 10:23
Scripture quotations taken from The Holy Bible, New International Version®, NIV®. Copyright © 1973, 1978, 1984, 2011 by Biblica, Inc. Used with permission of Zondervan. All rights reserved worldwide. www.zondervan.com
